I am not a victim.

Previously, yes. I was a victim of abuse, rejection, and ridicule…years, even decades.

Over time, with experiences that God allowed, and lessons I learned through studying His word, I know it wasn’t about me.

Do you consider Abel in the Bible a victim? No. He was just an innocent bystander of Cain’s anger against God (Genesis 4:1-12).

Everyone remembers Joseph’s story.

Pit bound…

Slave…

Unjustifiably accused …

Forgotten…

Here, Joseph wasn’t a victim. God allowed those things to happen for a purpose, an eternal purpose. Was it fair? No. Did Joseph feel betrayed and rejected by God? Read the story for the first time or again and decide for yourself. (Genesis 37:12-36, 39:1-23)

While you are going through abuse, suffering, or even ridicule, it can be devastating. Most likely, you feel as if you did something wrong. You feel alienated. You may feel,

Rejected or forgotten by God…

Betrayed by your husband, sister, friend, neighbor…

Ashamed, unworthy, depressed, useless…

You may feel like a scapegoat, first with questions, then believing what Satan is whispering to you.

What did I do to cause this to happen?

Why does he hate me?

Why is she gossiping about me?

Satan replays those questions and others in your mind until you feel hopeless, alone, and unloved.

The word victim wraps itself around a person like an enormous spiderweb. One that you did not see. You don’t want it on you. You fight to get it off. But still, it encompasses you. Victim makes a person look at themselves differently in a mirror. Victim makes a person think negatively about their capabilities. Victim makes the person’s relationship with God constrained and not trustworthy.

As a child, teenager, and adult I had been sexually abused. I felt for years that it was something I did to cause this. My mother confirmed those feelings by not believing me as a child, and then reminding me invariably that I would never succeed or accomplish anything. “White trash” is a term she treasured.

I have learned from Bible studies, from my studies in psychology, and from working with those in human trafficking, that it is not about anything that I did wrong, it was about the evil that was done against me, as it was with Joseph, “But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive” (Genesis 50:20/NKJV). Did I save people’s lives? No. Did I encourage rescued women and women working in the brothels that I understood some of what they had been through? To let them know there was hope and healing to be found? Yes.

I have not meant to make light of the horrific tragedies in our world – 911, genocide, Katrina, COVID-19, Afghanistan, Haiti, and so many more. Pure Evil.

I am speaking more personally to you.

When you look in the mirror, who do you see? When you think about your abilities, skills, gifts, are they without borders or limited to a small broken box?

“Until we care more about what God thinks than what other people think we are never truly free.” Christine Caine

Focus on what God thinks about you and reminds you of…

Nothing can separate you from the love of God. – Romans 8:38

You are accepted not rejected. – Isaiah 43:1

You are never truly alone. – Joshua 1:9

You never have to be afraid. – 2 Timothy 1:7

You are special to God. – Psalm 139:14

I am a visual person. I have reminder verses, quotes, and writings all over my house. When doubts surface or Satan whispers, I remind myself to put on the full armor of God (Ephesians 6:11), and:

1. Focus on Jesus
2. Be inspired by God’s Word
3. Walk in Faith
4. Run with Endurance
5. Pray – Wait – Trust

“Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” (Romans 15:13/NKJV).

Be encouraged. Be grateful. You are living proof that you are stronger than you believe. Now, go do something amazing…for the glory of God!