“Who, contrary to hope, in hope believed” (Romans 4:18).

As I am writing chapter 4 on disability in the book, several images have flooded my memory, and my emotions. A couple who are good friends of mine and I spoke the other day. Part of our conversation touched on our disabilities. Also, recently, I watched a podcast where Joni Eareckson Tada, a paraplegic, talked about how she was limited to how long she could speak due to the new increasing pain level. She experienced one of those pain attacks during the interview (see link below), but at the moment, she was still overflowing with hope, joy, and the love of Jesus Christ. Amazing… I sense that whenever I hear her speak or read her writing; I want that full joy during my pain. I want that filled-to-the-brim joy when I struggle with my memory after two-plus concussions.

I could have used that cup of joy last night.

I have had chronic pain for almost thirty years. After the first five years, I was able to live and function with the pain. Only rare flare-up sparks would take me down. Then four years ago, I was diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis. It’s been a whole new circus and I’m not laughing with the clowns. The pain has been intense… and I’m praying for any relief. Sleepless nights are as common as earthquakes in California. I am seeing my fifth Rheumatologist this month.

Back to last night… in exhaustion, I was ready to call it an early night… but my autistic son, who had taken his sleeping medicine, had other plans. I wish I could say that I was as happy as Snow White, or as compassionate as Mother Teresa… but that wasn’t the case. Of course, after he fell asleep, I was laden with guilt which overruled the pain. Gratefully, on my knees, I repented and knew there were other ways I could have handled that scenario instead of yelling.

Another sad memory was about a precious lady I met at a disability camp in July 2022 that my son and I attended. Even with a disabled teenager, she was always the sweetest, caring, person. Only nine months after camp she was diagnosed with cancer. She was like Abraham (Romans 4:18). When her father passed away in September 2023 after a short bout with cancer, even though sad, she was still trusting God, giving everything to Him. Two weeks later, this beautiful lady went to heaven.

I want that joyous hope in all circumstances… even with repeated sleepless nights and extreme pain.

We have many examples besides Joni Eareckson Tada that shine through the darkness.

• Nicholas James Vujicic – Tetra-Amelia Syndrome – no arms or legs – yet a motivational speaker.

• Jennifer Rothschild – lost her sight at age 15 due to a degenerative eye disease – she is a well-known speaker and Bible teacher.

• Katherine Wolf – with hopes of a promising career for her and her husband, six months after having a baby, had a brain stem stroke that left her as a paraplegic. She and her husband started Hope Heals and Hope Heals Camp. She is also an author and speaker sharing about the “Good hard life” with joy and confidence in the Lord.

Even with their disabilities, these four people, and many more, hope in the Lord so that disability doesn’t have the final word.

I’m not trying to gloss over the disabilities, difficulties, discouragements, and disappointments. I am saying that there is a Divine God who knows the day-in and day-out drudgery of living with a disability. He is reaching out to you saying, “Hold on to My hand. I’ll walk with you, comfort you, and assure you that, not just something good is going to come out of all of this, but that you will amazingly experience My power!”

Don’t give up. Don’t give in. Hold on to hope even when disability seems hopeless.

• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HnpG3ZG8sI8 – The Nearness of Christ in 50 Years of Suffering. Podcast with Joni Eareckson Tada/Alisa Childers – Host.
• Did you know that California experiences 100 earthquakes a day?! (California Earthquake Authority.com)
• https://www.jenniferrothschild.com
• HopeHeals.com – They are living the good hard and stating “We’re disrupting the myth that joy can only be found in a pain-free life.”

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